What else is there to say about this segment? For the readers it’s great, because you can deride my lack of NFL knowledge beyond the 49ers.

Picked ‘em every week, so in those games I’m 3-1 against the spread!

I’m in full Jay Cutler mode right now, so you’ll have to excuse me. My shoulders are slumped and I’m not feeling too optimistic about this season, I’ll have to admit. It’s not like I have a chance to win anyway. Just like Cutler’s line, my lines suck every week. Totally substandard, both from myself and the betting lines. How am I supposed to stack up against some guy with a computer for a brain, like Bay Area Stats Guy?

“Ooh, I just run my little numbers, and once the hamster falls out of the wheel a slip of paper comes out of the bottom of my GAME PROJECTOR 3000, and that tells me who’s going to win. Elementary.”

Or there’s East Bay Sports Guy, who may or may not spend 3/4 of his waking hours on Pro Football Focus and Football Outsiders. Meanwhile, I’m writing about baseball players wearing spandex bodysuits. Gee, wonder who’s in a better position to win.

So now that these grapes are making everyone pucker, it’s time to contribute something to this weekly post. So check out the photos of the 49ers’ new stadium in Santa Clara that I took today at the end of this post, after the graph that shows had badly I’m doing on these picks.

Arizona Cardinals (-2) @ St. Louis Rams
**Rams won 17-3**
Bay Area Sports Guy: Rams
East Bay Sports Guy: Rams
Bay Area Stats GuyCardinals
Ruthless Sports GuyCardinals
Bay Area Duck GuyCardinals

Cleveland Browns @ New York Giants (-10)
Bay Area Sports Guy: Giants
East Bay Sports Guy: Giants
Bay Area Stats Guy: Giants
Ruthless Sports Guy: Giants
Bay Area Duck Guy: Browns

Green Bay Packers (-7.5) @ Indianapolis Colts
Bay Area Sports Guy: Colts
East Bay Sports Guy: Colts
Bay Area Stats Guy: Colts
Ruthless Sports Guy: Colts
Bay Area Duck Guy: Packers

Philadelphia Eagles @ Pittsburgh Steelers (-3)
Bay Area Sports Guy: Steelers
East Bay Sports Guy: Eagles
Bay Area Stats Guy: Eagles
Ruthless Sports Guy: Steelers
Bay Area Duck Guy: Steelers

Baltimore Ravens (-7) @ Kansas City Chiefs
Bay Area Sports Guy: Chiefs
East Bay Sports Guy: Chiefs
Bay Area Stats Guy: Chiefs
Ruthless Sports Guy: Chiefs
Bay Area Duck Guy: Ravens

Miami Dolphins @ Cincinnati Bengals (-3)
Bay Area Sports Guy: Bengals
East Bay Sports Guy: Dolphins
Bay Area Stats Guy: Bengals
Ruthless Sports Guy: Bengals
Bay Area Duck Guy: Bengals

Chicago Bears (-4.5) @ Jacksonville Jaguars
Bay Area Sports Guy: Bears
East Bay Sports Guy: Bears
Bay Area Stats Guy: Bears
Ruthless Sports Guy: Jaguars
Bay Area Duck Guy: Bears

Seattle Seahawks @ Carolina Panthers (-3)
Bay Area Sports Guy: Seahawks
East Bay Sports Guy: Seahawks
Bay Area Stats Guy: Seahawks
Ruthless Sports Guy: Panthers
Bay Area Duck Guy: Seahawks

Tennessee Titans @ Minnesota Vikings (-5.5)
Bay Area Sports Guy: Vikings
East Bay Sports Guy: Titans
Bay Area Stats Guy: Vikings
Ruthless Sports Guy: Vikings
Bay Area Duck Guy: Titans

Denver Broncos @ New England Patriots (-7.5)
Bay Area Sports Guy: Broncos
East Bay Sports Guy: Broncos
Bay Area Stats Guy: Patriots
Ruthless Sports Guy: Broncos
Bay Area Duck Guy: Patriots

San Diego Chargers @ New Orleans Saints (-4)
Bay Area Sports Guy: Saints
East Bay Sports Guy: Saints
Bay Area Stats Guy: Chargers
Ruthless Sports Guy: Saints
Bay Area Duck Guy: Saints

Houston Texans (-9) @ New York Jets
Bay Area Sports Guy: Jets
East Bay Sports Guy: Texans
Bay Area Stats Guy: Texans
Ruthless Sports Guy: Jets
Bay Area Duck Guy: Texans

***

Oakland Raiders @ Bye (-3)

***

Buffalo Bills @ San Francisco 49ers (-11)

Bay Area Sports Guy: A few years ago, Candlestick Park would’ve been empty on a weekend like this with playoff baseball, concerts and Fleet Week going on. Instead, the positive energy should carry over to a packed house, the defense will follow up their shutout of the Jets by keeping Stevie Johnson, Donald Jones and Scott Chandler from going off in the passing game, and the offense will work on perfecting some trick plays of Greg Roman’s “mixers.” Pick: 49ers

East Bay Sports Guy Do I think the 49ers will win? Of course. Do I think they’ll win by 10? Of course not. We’ll be lucky if the cumulative score reaches 10. This will be a defensive battle, or as I like to call it, naptime. Wake me up when it’s over.  Pick: Bills

Bay Area Stats GuyI like the 49ers but I have a hard time laying down 11 points. The model says they will win 57 percent of the time with an average margin of 3 points, a median margin of 4 pints and the most common score 24 to 17. I think that they win by a touchdown to possibly ten points but I am not certain enough that they can cover 11 to lay those points. Pick: Bills

Ruthless Sports Guy: I was initially going to take the Bills here because 11 is an awfully big number, but then I remembered just how nails Jim Harbaugh has been against the spread. I’ll give Buffalo the 11 points and hope that Coach is in a bad mood. Pick: 49ers

Bay Area Duck Guy: After what we saw last weekend, it’s very difficult to bet against the 49ers, even with a spread like this. If this game was in Buffalo, I may lean towards the Bills scoring enough to be within the spread. But the game is in San Francisco, so Harbaugh and the boys will get it done. Pick: 49ers

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GAME OF THE WEEK:
Atlanta Falcons (-2.5) @ Washington Redskins

Bay Area Sports Guy: I don’t see any team staying undefeated for an extraordinarily long time, even the Houston Texans. While the Falcons are the better team, I see Robert Griffin III leading Washington to their first home victory of the season on Sunday. Pick: Redskins

East Bay Sports GuyThis pick was largely determined by skepticism. That is, I don’t believe the Falcons can go 5-0. Though I don’t think RGIII’s arm can beat the Falcons, I think his legs can. The Redskins have the second best rushing attack in the NFL, according to ProFootball Focus, while the Falcons have the sixth worst rush defense. This combination means Matt Ryan and that explosive Falcons’ offense will be relegated to the sidelines on Sunday. Pick: Redskins

Bay Area Stats Guy The Falcons should win this game about 55 percent of the time, which was actually surprisingly low for what the projected scores came out to be. The average margin was 5 points, the median 3 and the most common score was 24-20. I like the Falcons to improve to 5-0 with a win here. Pick: Falcons

Ruthless Sports Guy: Homefield advantage for the Skins just doesn’t scare me away from the Falcons on this one. Atlanta is unbelievable and I don’t see many teams that can beat them right now. Add in the advantage of covering with a 3-point win and I just can’t resist. Pick: Falcons

Bay Area Duck Guy: I’m going with the underdog at home here. The Falcons are the better team, but they really don’t have much to play for – no one is even close in the NFC South. Matt Ryan and co. could easily overlook RG3 and Washington to the point where the Redskins put some points on the board at home. Pick: Redskins