Well, that was an interesting little experiment, asking for jokes about the Giants and A’s in the comments. It was pretty surprising to me that even though far more content related to the Giants exists on this site (in large part because the Giants provide press box and clubhouse access to yours truly and the A’s do not), there seemed to be a higher proportion of A’s fans in the comments, both making fun of the Giants and voting either “thumbs up” or “thumbs down” on the jokes people were making.
Since you guys put yourselves out there and made all those jokes, I figured it was only fair if I went against my better judgment and came up with some jokes of my own. I apologize in advance…
— The A’s were a great team in the late-80s. Great team. More needles in that locker room than in four square blocks of the Tenderloin, but they were great.
— The 2001 Giants should’ve renamed their stadium to Pac BALCO Park. In the outfield you had guys like Barry Bonds, Marvin Benard and Armando Rios. At catcher? Benito Santiago and Bobby Estalella. The catcher behind Estalella was Yorvit Torrealba, but that’s only because Triple-H wasn’t available.
— My doctor told me that I’m allergic to Ambien, but I’m in luck — the same active ingredient is in every A’s telecast.
— Brian Wilson’s beard, Sergio Romo’s beard … I don’t know who likes beards more, San Francisco or Tom Cruise…
— Your mama’s so fat, she’s only an A’s fan because she hopes they’ll bring the All-You-Can-Eat section back to the upper deck.
— And if that happens, Pablo Sandoval will immediately demand a trade.
Thank you, thank you, I’ll be here all weekend.
Now, back to the contest so we can give out a couple shirts. I picked eight jokes out of the several you guys made. Four jokes making fun of the Giants, four making fun of the A’s. Read them all, and choose your favorite…
At the Giants’ expense:
1. The only good thing about going to a Giants game is … you can bring your 4-year-old daughter and tell her she’s at the Zoo.
2. What do the A’s and Giants have in common? They have 10 to 15,000 knowledgeable, hard-core fans show up to their games every night.
3. Huh, I like the A’s trophy case, because it looks like a professional baseball team filled it. You guys do have a nice collection of yuppies and soccer moms though.
4. Most of the Giants fans think Chili Davis is something on the menu in place of garlic fries…..
At the Athletics’ expense:
5. If a perfect game is thrown (on Mother’s Day), but no one is there to see it, did it really happen?
6. Do you know why Green is the Oakland A’s color? Because the whole team is envious of McCarthy’s wife!
7. Can’t wait to go to the Coliseum this weekend to see this rivalry re-ignited with star power on both sides! Cain, Posey, and Melky for the Giants. Gio, Ethier, and CarGo for the A’s…. wait a minute.
8. Oakland hasn’t had consistent hits since Too $hort.
Vote for your favorite joke out of those eight in the comments (if you just want to write which number was your favorite, that’s fine). Top two vote-getters through Sunday win shirts from DIE HARD CO. Winners announced on Monday, as well as the winners from the Bay Bridge Series prediction post that Bay Area Stats Guy wrote.