Jeremy Affeldt SF GiantsAs Tom Tolbert and Eric Byrnes passed the baton to Jon Miller at the beginning of today’s San Francisco Giants pregame show, Miller mentioned that Jeremy Affeldt was placed on the 15-day disabled list today. Affeldt will be replaced by Jean Machi, who has pitched well in five appearances for Triple-A Fresno.

Miller also told us how Affeldt injured himself, and I thought it was a joke at first. The Hall of Fame announcer said that Affeldt strained his right oblique when he had a “sneezing fit” while lying in bed in Chicago, which would be the third off-the-field injury the lefty reliever has suffered in the last three years.

The first, which occurred in September of 2011, is probably the most famous:

While using a “paring knife” to separate frozen burger patties (you’d think baseball players could afford fresh ground Kobe beef, but whatever), Affeldt lacerated his right hand “pretty bad,” according to Bochy. Bad enough to cause nerve damage that required surgery yesterday, and as a result Affeldt will miss the rest of the season.

The second came at the hands of an energetic and punishing foe: his son:

Affeldt returned home after Saturday night’s game against San Diego. As he walked through the door, his 4-year-old son Walker leaped off a sofa and ran into his papa’s arms. Walker is a very big 4-year-old, 4 1/2-feet tall already. Affeldt said as he crouched he had to shift his weight to grab his son and he felt a pop in the knee.

Affeldt barely escaped serious injury during the 2012 postseason while hanging out just off the field:

Jeremy Affeldt pitched a shutout seventh inning and was supposed to face Jay Bruce in the eighth, but Affeldt had to be removed after a screamer off Gregor Blanco’s bat sent him scrambling. Affeldt was standing on the top step of the dugout and ducked out of the way, only to fall down the steps and jam his left hand as he braced himself for the fall.

Affeldt was wearing a wrist guard on his left throwing arm during the postgame celebration, but insisted he was OK.

“I’m just wearing it in case one of these knuckleheads tries to hit me with a champagne bottle,” he said. “I wish I would have gotten hit by the ball because it would have made me seem tougher. It’s just another weird injury.”

Poor Affeldt. Wendy Thurm suggested the Giants cover him in bubble wrap, but I get the feeling that even if they did that he’d find some way to sit on a porcupine.