Bengie Molina

NL ROY Tracker … laundromat hell

If I’ve done this rant before, forgive me. I just got back from the laundromat, and there’s no way I’m not going to start off today’s NL Rookie of the Year Tracker without a healthy amount of gratuitous complaining.

Why am I kvetching during a day off where it’s in the mid-70’s here in San Francisco? Because there’s absolutely nothing worse than having to do one’s laundry in a laundromat. I defy you to come up with a worse chore. Dishes? No way. Vacuuming? That can actually be fun, especially when you pick up something into the vacuum cleaner that you shouldn’t and it makes that horrible noise. Oh, you know it isn’t good for the machine, but everything dies at some point. To control something in your apartment that suddenly starts sounding like a homemade moped is actually kind of exciting. God, I’m a dork.

But going to the laundromat is terrible. First, unless you happen to live right above/near one, you have to figure out a way to get 50 lbs. of clothes, towels and sheets 3-5 blocks away (today I decided to give myself a break and take the car out of the garage and drive the three blocks). Sure, it would make sense to do laundry more often so you don’t have to carry so much back and forth, but nobody who lives blocks away from the nearest laundry machines does laundry until every acceptable pair of underwear has been exhausted.

Another horribly annoying thing about laundromats is you have to procure a ridiculous amount of quarters to use their frightening machines (anyone who’s ever used a dryer that decided to get angry and heat your clothes at 500 degrees — thereby ruining pretty much every shirt you own — knows how scary some of these machines can be), which leads you to meticulously save each quarter you get at the end of each day in order to avoid a trip to the bank to get rolls of quarters (and who ever wants to actually go inside a bank anymore?). Then, if you work during the week and can only do laundry on the weekends, it’s impossible to pick a time on a Saturday when the laundromat isn’t incredibly packed. Then, there are machines left, but they’re broken. There’s a special place in hell for laundromat owners who don’t clearly mark the machines that are out of order.

Then you have to decide whether to sit in the laundromat and wait for the clothes to finish getting washed so you can then transfer them into a dryer that (of course) isn’t anywhere close to the washer you just used. Then you have to fold the clothes (agony) and lug them back up three flights of stairs back to your apartment, where you then have to put your clothes away (double agony) and make the bed if you washed your sheets (triple agony).

The moral of the story: when you go apartment hunting, make sure there’s a washer and dryer on site. Otherwise, the only suitable option is to bring your clothes to the nearest relative’s house who has a washer and dryer. Even a visit to your aunt who wants to show you 400 pictures of their recent trip to Branson, Missouri is worth avoiding laundromat hell.

Okay, so what was the headline I wrote 15 minutes ago? Oh yeah…

Jason Heyward

Current stats: .282/.398/.468, 18 HR, 10 SB, 3.1 UZR/150, 4.5 WAR

Last night:  0-for-4, K. Braves lost 8-3 to the Nationals. Heyward lost 0.1 off his WAR, so he must have really sucked.

Trending: Down

Chances of winning NL ROY: 49%

Buster Posey

Current stats: .320/.369/.520, 16 HR, 0 SB, 21/58 CS, 4.0 WAR

Last night: 0-for-3, BB, R. The Giants won 2-1 in Colorado on a Pat Burrell 2-run homer following a walk to Posey, while I was trying on suits for my upcoming wedding. Some Bay Area Sports Guy I am.

The reason why this ROY race is so exciting is that it’s so close even though Posey is a far better hitter than Heyward. Heyward takes more walks, but you can argue that’s because he takes so many pitches during full counts, while Posey is more interested in protecting the plate. Heyward sees 4.13 pitches for plate appearance, while Posey’s PAs average 3.89 pitches. Not a huge difference.

However, Heyward’s got the Fred Lewis-esque habit of acting like a leadoff guy who has power (which for Lewis has made him a leadoff hitter in Toronto after the Giants steadfastly refused to consistently use Lewis in that role). Posey, on the other hand, sees himself as a guy who’s job is to knock in runs (although to be fair, Heyward is much faster than Posey, so both players are probably right in doing what they do). Their differences in offensive philosophy have led to more walks and strikeouts for Heyward, and more hits, higher slugging and more GIDP’s for Posey.

And it’s official: Tim Lincecum doesn’t miss Bengie Molina. And with all this talk about OBP, defensive ability and everything else, if one of these teams makes the playoffs and the other gets left out, the voters will probably reward the “winner.” And as I write this, the Braves are a 1/2 game behind the Padres in the wild card race.

Trending: Up

Chances of winning NL ROY: 51%

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