Moving on from Brian Wilson’s friendship with Charlie Sheen to another titillating non-story about the World Champs, a Tim Lincecum video got picked up by Yahoo’s Big League Stew baseball blog. And since along with Wilson, Lincecum’s is the team’s other rockstar, non-stories often grow into actual stories depending upon further developments (like bongs on tables). From Stew:
This clip that was posted on Feb. 18 claims to feature “Luis,” a Brazilian cab driver in San Francisco who looks so much like the San Francisco Giants pitcher that he says people won’t leave him alone. He requests $1 million dollars from Lincecum in exchange for driving him around and hosting Tiny Tim and his friends in Rio De Janeiro for the 2014 World Cup.
Here’s the thing, though: The guy looks so much like Lincecum — right down to the lines in his smile — that it’s hard to watch him without thinking we’re being goofed by Lincecum himself. Check it out:
So is it Lincecum or not? It seems like there are only two options:
1. It’s some guy named Luis who looks like Lincecum and hopes his “twin” will float him some weed money. Sounds like a cabbie I want driving me around. Of course, with how often cab drivers in San Francisco get lost, maybe marijuana use among is indeed pretty, err, high (sorry).
2. It’s Tim Lincecum, doing a bit while incredibly stoned a year or so ago (when his hair was shorter), and the video got uploaded a few weeks ago without Lincecum’s permission.
When Lincecum Luis removes his cap, he looks a little less like Timmy than he does with the hat on. Sort of. Maybe not. I don’t even know. This whole thing has left me so confused. For one, what the hell is he guy talking about in the video? Something about taking him on a cab ride to the World Cup for a million dollars? Okay.
Is this really Lincecum, with the sound (which is a little off) dubbed over? Is he capable of an accent like this? When he starts talking about the World Cup and seems to come close to losing it, is that Lincecum doing a Jimmy Fallon impression (laughing in the middle of a sketch), or is Luis just a really happy guy?
Like I said in the beginning, this is a complete non-story. Unless the person who posted the video becomes known, or this “Luis” character shows up somewhere else (like as my cabdriver the next time I need a ride home late on a Friday or Saturday night). Whatever it is, all this stuff is great. The thong, the Machine, the beards, Lincecum’s similarities to the kids playing hacky sack at UCSC’s Porter College, the whole Pat Burrell thing in the Marina (don’t worry, a little penicillin clears it right up) … instead of Giants overkill, I can’t get enough (although it’ll be nice once they actually start playing regular season games). The Giants will be remembered years from now as the most entertaining, interesting, unique teams in Bay Area history, not just for winning a World Series, but for silliness like this Lincecum imposter video.