I’ve never really done it, since I’ve never commented on Baggs’ site and most of my commentary on McCoven have to do with far less serious items than lineups (two of my comments today were “I.P. Freely” and “Oliver Clothesoff”). But I don’t blame anybody. Bochy’s lineups make about as much sense as that South Carolinian girl in the beauty pageant who talked about “the Iraq and the Asian countries.”
So here’s one man’s lineup. I know it’s impossible to please everybody, that there’s surely going to be at least a few people out there who think this lineup is just as bad as one where Rich Aurilia hits leadoff. But I think most of you will agree this is better than anything Bochy has thought of. And don’t worry, I don’t have the pitcher batting eighth. Can’t wait to see the Giants do that when they hire Tony LaRussa in five years.
1. Eugenio Velez (LF, CF): Dude’s earned it. Just don’t put him in the infield, and quiz him before every game on where he’d throw the ball based on the situation.
2. Nate Schierholtz (RF): He can handle the bat well and he has decent speed. Isn’t that all you need in a No. 2 hitter?
3. Freddy Sanchez (2B): He’s the second-best contact hitter on the team. Thing is, he’s second to the team’s best power hitter, which is why…
4. Pablo Sandoval (3B): That Bengie Molina is still hitting cleanup is absolutely criminal. Sandoval can not only handle the pressure, he wants it.
5. Randy Winn/Aaron Rowand/Fred Lewis (CF/LF): None of the three has shown a reason to believe they’re worth starting every day. But a nice spot in the order and the right matchups could be a great boost to this underachieving trio.
6. Ryan Garko/Travis Ishikawa (1B): At least they take pitches every once in a while. Not sure what to make of Garko though, if he can’t handle switching leagues and an arbitration year, can he handle the pressures of a playoff race?
7. Bengie Molina (C): The perfect place for Bengie. Hitting him 7th would probably add about five years to the life expectancy of every Giants fan.
8. Juan Uribe (SS): Yeah, that’s right. I’ve had enough Edgar Renteria. Of the last 20 (televised) games, I’ve only missed one — yesterday’s win. I heard Renteria was feisty. Good for him. I’d rather have Uribe out there the rest of the year, especially if that means I won’t have to hear anything more about bone chips and faulty elbows.
And there you have it. It’s not a great lineup, but then again nobody the Giants have can hit a ball 800 feet like Prince Fielder did today. (Seriously, did you see that shit? I’ll put Prince’s homer off the center field scoreboard up against any homer hit by Mark McGwire, Barry Bonds or Sammy Sosa. I wish MLB weren’t run by a bunch of grandfathers, or maybe I’d be able to link to a video of it. But alas, you’ll have to catch it on SportsCenter like I did or watch it on the Brewers’ home page on their one-inch videoscreen.)