Well, kind of a crazy day on top of a crazy week. I was like Larry Riley or Robert Rowell today, as my manager at work (yes, I have a real job) “resigned.” Quotation marks because everyone “resigns” where I work, although we know that a majority of the time they were fired or at least nudged out with some sort of buyout.
So now everyone’s scrambling, thinking of ways to kiss the new manager’s ass in hopes of getting promoted or at least escaping the next round of layoffs, since those are probably coming even though the higher-ups say they aren’t. Very interesting stuff, but after a week of major back pain and Chris Cohan (not sure which is worse), I’m ready to just veg out and sit in front of the TV. So what’s on?
Not much, actually.
After that period of time when the NBA and NHL playoffs, baseball and the U.S. Open all were going on at the same time, which was followed by the World Cup, you almost expect good televised sports to be on all the time. Not so much anymore. We’re talking only two sports, unless NASCAR floats your boat (and it doesn’t float mine, as I watched NASCAR for about six months 5+ years ago, sort of like how I got into wrestling when The Rock was at the height of his powers before turning my back on the WWE once he started doing kids movies like some roided-out Eddie Murphy).
Does this mean I’m going to have to (gasp) get outside and get some fresh air? Or even worse, go shopping? Well, not the entire weekend. Here’s when I plan to be parked in front of the LCD screen, at least when I’m not parked in front of a screen at the Kabuki watching “Inception,” the first movie we’re attending since “Avatar.”
1. Giants vs. Mets, 6 p.m. Saturday
Matt Cain and Mike Pelfrey looked like two of the best pitchers in the National League a month ago. Now….sheesh. Also, Cain (who never seems to be looking at his target when they take pictures of him pitching) didn’t face the Mets in New York, so this is the first time he’ll face them since drilling David Wright in the face. Something tells me the Mets didn’t forget that, and something tells me Cain won’t escape the wrath as easily as Vicente Padilla did after beaning Aaron Rowand. Maybe Matt Cain should wear some sort of Steve Wallace-esque double batting helmet when he hits AND pitches. And yes, I know I lost all my under-30 readers with that Steve Wallace line.
2. The British Open, Before You Wake Up
Windy as hell, brown fairways and a shit-ton of pretentiousness. Yep, this is the tournament to watch. However, there’s an outside chance that Tiger Woods and John Daly will be in contention all weekend (Tiger’s tied for 15th, 8 shots behind some guy named Louis Oosthuizen at -4, and Daly’s 2 shots behind Tiger). And Mickelson’s at even par too. Could be interesting, if you’re used to waking up early to watch World Cup matches.
3. A’s @ Royals, 4 p.m. Saturday
Yeah, nobody cares, but Trevor Cahill’s pitching and he’s pretty awesome.
4. Giants vs. Mets, 1 p.m. Sunday
Jonathan Sanchez against Johan Santana is probably the most interesting pitching matchup in a series full of them. Sanchez is driving everyone crazy with his general Sanchyness in regards to throwing pitches in the strike zone, and Santana usually has a tough time against the Giants (well, the last couple years, anyway).
So there you have it. Four halfway decent options to keep you from shopping with your girlfriend/wife. Enjoy the weekend, you lazy couch potatoes! I’m off now to go forget about work with the help of my fiance and several luxury mojitos. Don’t wait up.